look! a rainbow!

this morning, on the cab on our way to the little big man's school we saw this:

sorry it's blurred, i was inside a moving vehicle when i shot this.  it's a rainbow, in case you can't recognize it. it's special because it's a full arch -- as in half a circle which sent me a lot more positive vibes.

last night was another restless night.  i was finally able to download "Sound of Music" for my mom.  yes, the 1965 classic which she has been requesting since about two weeks ago when i also had restless nights. funny how i am able to accomplish things when there are restless nights.  so ok, i'm being redundant.  but my life *has* actually become redundant with the burden that God is putting me through right now.  i know this will pass and i am hanging on.  i don't know His plans for me and my family but i believe if He put me to this, He'll get me through this.  

another "good" thing about these restless nights is that i am also able to watch the new tv series that i want (new girl, 2 broke girls) and update on the old ones i missed (glee, big bang theory) because no one is bugging me to watch other shows.  i am able to sleep at whatever time i want and go on the internet until forever.  my kids' nanny has been helpful, both physically and emotionally and i am grateful for the time we spend talking and she giving me encouragement.  who would've thought she could become my friend?  my mom had nothing but kind words of hope and support and surprisingly, my dad is calmer and only wishes me to handle this with compassion.

i've looked through the internet for ways to help myself and my little family and i know with time and patience, we will overcome this.

so like in my last post, this post is testament to my faith in the rainbow after the rain, the silver lining behind every cloud and a happier me once all this is over.

God measures a person with the burden He puts on him.  

So when we feel our load is heavier than the rest, 

be happy for God sees us stronger than the rest.

-SMS sent by chinggu just this morning

Notes:
Week before Migo's bday, 10k?? Forgot
Week before Oct 23, Nem's wedding, 6k
Nov 8 - 17, 16k
Nov 23 - 25, 2k

my immorality

immorality
[im-uh-ral-i-tee, im-aw-] -- noun, plural -ties
1.  immoral quality, character, or conduct; wickedness; evilness.
2. sexual misconduct.
3.  an immoral act.

--lifted from Dictionary.com

i try to find the right word for it.  let me disclaim that i haven't done any such act as described above.  i am merely pondering on another's.  three others in fact.

i know of a woman who is in a relationship with a priest.  for many, many years now.  she is a friend and i know she trusted me with this secret because she considers me her friend.  when she told me, i did not blink an eye and told her i have no right to judge her and i accept her for what she is.  it is between her and God.

there's a man i know who has more than two wives.  the wife he lives with does not know, or maybe she pretends she doesn't to save her face and her marriage or her kids.  the other woman lives in another country and only recently found out about the wife but she continues her relationship with the man she claims she loves and loves her equally.  this man had a wife before the one he lives with now.  and i am quite sure he has other women in other places who he believes he loves.  i cannot judge this man.  it is between him and God.

a man i know is into gambling.  he loves his family, he says, but cannot stop.  sometimes he wastes the family income and says he's sorry later.  only to do it again, week after week, month after month, year after year.  i do not judge this man either.  for as the others, it is between him and God.

knowing all these and not doing anything about it.... does it make me immoral??  is it also between me and God that i am not helping these people stay away from sin?  will people judge me if they find out about what i know?