lost phone

little big man lost his cellphone in the school gym yesterday.  guess it was bound to happen anyway.  somehow, the hubby and i sort of new something like this can happen.  the kid really has to learn things the hard way.

misadventures of a working mom

i'm a trying hard working mother.  this much i know.

last week, i convinced the powers that be at work to let me off early (for the rest of my working life at that company) for the reason that i get to the office earlier than necessary.  so officially, i'm off at 5pm instead of 6pm and i am on my merry way home before sunset.  eversince they removed our privilage of flexible time schedule, this is what i've always wanted and now i got it and i'm happy.  at least now, i can be with my kids early.

last night was a toink moment.  something i'm not very proud of.  

of course, i was home early and i immediately started workin tle computer on a project.  since i was early and the nanny still gets off at 7pm, i let her and the little girl play while i worked.  by 7pm, i let her go while the little girl stayed with me inside the bedroom while i continued working.

after a while, i heard the little girl sobbing and as i turned to look at her, she broke down in tears.  she then told me in between sobs that i shouldn't have let her nanny off coz she doesn't have anything to do and she was sad.  so i immediately bolted out of the revolving computer chair, wrapped my arms around her and told her we could play.  to which she replied, "eh mommy ka eh. di ka naman naglalaro eh!"

my heart literally broke.  how could she think that way?  i hugged her to me and told her, of course, i can play.  so what do you want us to play?  in my mind, i was hitting myself in the head with my fist.  what have i done?  i knew i should stop working at that moment and spend the rest of the evening with her, which i should've done the minute i got home in the first place.

we went to the living room and the little girl got 2 balls and she wanted us to alternately roll each ball at each other while slumped on the floor on opposite ends of the room.  i tried to sound happy and animated as we did this but after a few rolls, she started bawling again.  i am not happy at what we're doing!

i came over to her again to appease her.  i carried her to the bedroom, holding her close and asked her again what she wanted us to do.  she said she wanted to play or do something but she doesn't know what.  ok, so let's see....what do we do?  how about the computer? 

she settled with an online game where we played hosts in a virtual spa and tended to customers who wanted massages, facials and hair treatments.  we did this the rest of the evening until the hubby and little big man arrived from taekwondo practice.

looking back, and after telling this to the hubby, i realized that the reason why i requested for an early off from work is so i can "do my responsibilities as a mother" early.  i didn't do that.  instead, i worked some more.  i know now what to do.

see andre, i'm not perfect?

birthday boy

the little big man turned 9 years old last saturday.  

i can only look at him in awe as i watched him play milo little olympics yesterday.  he's grown so much is an understatement.  he's physically grown.  proven by the fact that whenever he sleeps beside me and he throws his legs and arms over me, i feel choked and helpless under his weight.  

his taekwondo skills have way improved and his level of maturity in the game has drastically upped over the last couple of weeks.  we saw how we beat his opponent in the first game through sudden death.  his shot was so clear and precise, no biased referee can discount it.  we saw how, in his second game, he fell two times and lost to that palarong pambansa champ and not shed a tear, his poker face undaunted, his will to win and pride in himself still in tact but maintaining humility in his stance.

emotionally, he still has a lot of growing to do.  as a kuya (older brother) to his sister, we still have a lot to work on.  we have a lot of time to do that.  bottomline, despite their frequent quarrels, at the end of the day, they still know they love each other more than anything.

in school, he's improved a lot too.  he's still talkative and all that, says what he wants and comments on everything.  but he's a fast learner and once challenged, always strives to better himself.

it's maybe been a year since he told me he wanted his own cellphone.  and eversince, the hubby and i always tell him that when he's responsible enough, by that we meant not losing his ballpens, his ID or getting dirt on his school uniform, that's the time when he gets that cellphone.  

well, within the few weeks before his 9th birthday, he still lost a pen or two but not as much as before. 

and that much coveted cellphone? 

random drawing

the little big man drew this 2 months ago.  thought i'd share it here for posterity.

the pains of nanny-less me

i'm so stressed.  and it's only 7:30 in the morning!!

and i am entirely blaming it on not having a nanny for over two weeks now.  she took a leave because her mother is ill and she has to take care of her and other responsibilities concerning her health benefits and documents.

this morning, the kids' uniforms were not dry yet.  blame it on the continuous rain for the last couple of days and yes, no nanny to regularly check if there is uniform ready for the next day.  the hubby had to spin dry them while i took care of getting the kids out of bed, bathing them, making them drink their milk, brush their teeth.  literally, step by step, i had to tell them what to do!  despite they've been doing the same routine everyday!

then when we brought the little girl to school, she didn't want to be left there because nobody was there yet since it was too early!  so we had to drag her and bring first the little big man to his school and then bring her back just in time to be at least 20 minutes late. and since this is the case, the hubby cannot drive me to work coz he has to bring her back asap.

spell stress.  now at work.  my day has just begun.  wish me luck.

mom "me"

i washed some of my kids' and hubby's clothes and underwear a little while ago.  two days of typhoon and a week's worth of laundry (due to the absence of my nanny/helper) summoned me to do it against my will.  i just did a few though to get the family through the weekend.  


i have a confession to make.  i can't believe i enjoyed it.  i'm not kidding.

it dawned on me as i was rinsing the suds off the little big man's P.E. t-shirt as i thought about how it should dry overnight cause he needed to wear it tomorrow.  (sorry we don't have a dryer.)  i wondered if our helper would thoroughly rinse our laundry or would she haphazardly do it just to get it over and done with.  as i thoroughly squished and squashed dirty socks, i imagined myself doing this everyday with only the thought that i'm doing it for my kids.  then it hit me:  i would rather do this than sit on my office chair right at this very moment.

then again, after finally saying it out loud (literally, with the larger fonts i used), it may be just because i don't do it everyday and maybe i felt the novelty of me washing clothes.  

earlier today, as i browsed the grocery for the stuff the little girl will be needing for tomorrow's school activities, i thought, what the heck, this is fun!  it gave me that sense of fulfillment that everything is taken cared of for my daughter and that i personally prepared everything for her.  thus,i am assured that she has everything she needs.  these things i couldn't have done, and the hubby wouldn't have done, had i didn't skip work today to take care of the little girl.

then again, maybe the hubby would've done it if i weren't around?  and i'm just using this as an alibi so i can resign from my job and be a stay-at-home-mom like i've always dreamed of?

whatever it is, i still think, as i've thought of for the last couple of months, that maybe i should really start thinking of a career that involves me staying with the family most of the time.  so there.  so shoot me, boss.

all about my life -- the blog

i have switched jobs again.  well not that i switch jobs often but being a working mom, you know what i mean.  from a nanny to a prod dev manager in a fashion company to a fetcher to a tutor to ass-washer to t-shirt designer and whatever else -- all in one day.  somehow you get the picture.  and this varies daily.

so as i was saying, i have a new job.  now i am officially an editor.  this was since last saturday when the little big man announced that he wanted to write a blog.  i got so worked up to hear this that i spot on made him his own email address, opened a blogger account for him and told him to type away. 

so to my dear readers, i know you're not plenty, please do find time to visit sharkboyslife.blogspot.com.  it's all about the little big man's life -- as seen through his eight-year old eyes and heart.  well, he's almost nine.  

his ambitions list so far:  taekwondo jin slash writer slash engineer slash chef.

ambition

took this pic today just so i would be able to look back someday and see if it came true.

the little big man has said some time ago that he wants to be a chef someday.  over the weekend, he was supposed to answer this application form for club membership in their school.  last schoolyear, he was in the math club and art club which were, as far as i know, really his inclinations.  this schoolyear, guess what he chose.  and check out his reason.

"My reason in Cretive Chef because I want to cook delicious foods to my wife when I grow up."

may gusto

last monday, the hubby and i fetched the little girl from kindergarten school.  as we were leaving, a classmate ran after her and shot his arms through the gate rails shouting:

julla, tandaan mo 'to, may gusto ako sa 'yo!  tandaan mo, may gusto ako sa 'yo ha!!  he shouted this towards us for like eight times!

{remember this, i like you!  remember this, i like you!}

to which the little girl shot back while laughing:

hindi ko tatandaan!!

{i won't remember!}

the hubby and i laughed with her.  later i asked her if she liked him too.  to which she replied:

hindi.

{no.}

for the record, his name is mark enzo t. tapoc.  the hubby and i have got our eyes on you, boy!  i looked up a picture from last year's christmas party.  you're marked, mark! :)

a trip down the aisle

i've been meaning to blog for like a hundred times this past month but i can never seem to be able to sit down and concentrate on writing.  lots of things have been happening and it would've been good to be able to record my thoughts on these events but i guess, it wasn't meant to be.  well, because most of it were negative thoughts about work.  like i said in one of my tweets, too many fml moments these past weeks.

on the upside, (which makes me believe sometimes that i just might be bipolar) a lot of good things happening as well.

well my thoughts since last friday are these.

it was the first of july.  the hubby and i went to get some work done for the b.  incidentally, it was in the area of the basilica of san lorenzo ruiz, otherwise known as binondo church, otherwise known to hubby and me as the church where we got married.

ten years ago this month, we wed here.

yes, i walked down that aisle to my teary-eyed groom. it was a day where nothing could possibly go wrong, everything seemed perfect and only happiness abound.  

last friday, we walked on this aisle, sat on a pew on the right halfway from the altar and said our prayer for the next ten plus years ahead.  we both have new dreams and goals from way back ten years ago.  we got our little family now to live for, not just each other.  and we're back here, vowing to make things work.

then we headed towards the left side to st. lorenzo ruiz.

this guy, he knows exactly what we want from him for he is our little big man's namesake.  

a lot of things have changed since our last trip down the aisle.  but our faith and hope and love remain.

about that soul dream

from that last blog entry about soul dream comes a very immediate development.

last night, the hubby told me the new coach told him that the little big man can get a high school scholarship in ateneo if he continues to do well in taekwondo.  well isn't that an answered prayer so soon?  (yes, he has a new coach but that's another story for another blog entry.)

anyways, i haven't read on with that e-book so i still have yet to find out what -- really -- is my soul dream.  but then again, i believe, the ultimate of it all is that i eventually find our little family successful in whatever dream we pursue.

soul dream

started reading an e-book by bo sanchez and chapter 3 urged me to write down my dreams on paper.  well, i decided to blog about it instead.  that way, years from now, i believe i can go back to this page and see if i fulfilled any of it or if i failed.

the purpose of this is to realize what actually my soul dream is.  it says that soul dreams are fuelled by super human passion.  a touch of the divine wakes up from within and we're transformed with heroic perseverance.

so randomly now, here's my list.


get the little big man into ateneo, if not next school year, in high school and college.
alongside that, the little girl in miriam.


succeed in the thing we're putting up (which i cannot publish about yet).  make it profitable while allowing me to be creative.  me and the hubby.


family trips.  beach, overseas, wherever we want.


become a stay-at-home mom while managing a family business.


little big man in the olympics.  taekwondo of course.

alongside that, the little girl shining in her own right. we haven't discovered yet what for now.

our own family home.  our dwelling.  quezon city preferable but valenzuela will always be home.

driving.  me, behind the wheel.  manual or automatic.


being able to help other families, children especially -- financially, emotionally, spiritually.


taking care of my mom and dad for the rest of their life.


growing old and healthy together.  hubby and me.  contented with our life. together.




so there.

fast cars

  i guess i'm one of the few people who appreciates fast cab drivers.  i like it when i'm on a cab that spotaneously whizzes by other cars along edsa.  i like it when we criss-cross lanes and get ahead of all the other vehicles, be it a commuter bus, an all-power SUV or a latest model high-end car.  it gives me an early morning high as i turn up the volume on my headphones and psyche myself up for another day at work.  yes, i succumbed to cabbing again today.

anyway, when i thought about it now, the reason why i like it is because the hubby drives in a laid back manner, always letting other vehicles get ahead of us.  he's not the type who would race with a fellow vehicle on the road.  he is never in a hurry to get to where we're going.  and i am so used to cars who whiz past ours.  

well, so maybe i like the occasional rush but then again, i will always be comfortable with the hubby's driving.  thank God he's a very cautious and defensive driver.  our little family should always be safe.

savings

 
today, i ditched cabbing and rode the bus (and jeep) to work.  it was not fun.  the bus, although airconditioned, was slightly old and rusty.  it stopped and picked up passengers in the most unlikely corners and the movie playing was that of sylvester stallone, jet li, dolph lundgren and that cute guy from the transporter.  (what's his name, google? uhh.. yeah, jason statham).  to get to my next stop took me about 40 minutes.  then took a 5-minute jeepney ride to the office. 

it wasn't the best morning of my life.  i couldn't bring out my samsung galaxy tab and tweet or listen to music.  i was cramped in the seat right above the bus' tire.  my seatmate had her arm on top of mine.  

this is what i had to endure fora savings of 130 bucks today.

(130 x 5 days = 650bucks a week!!)

the new baby b



http://www.achildbirth.com/birthing-options.html



last year, hubby and i decided on a new baby:  http://ceschami.blogspot.com/2010/07/baby-b-electricity-and-water.html

only this year, this month has it finally come to fruition.  well, just so that on the onset, everything is clear, i'm not talking about a human baby.  we got everything set up already and all it needs is the actual implementation and roll out.

well they said it was the rapture yesterday, if not the end of the world, but i say it's a new beginning for the hubby and me and our little family.  God spoke to me again last friday while we were preparing everything for the baby.  i saw a couple, the man was on crutches and the woman was on a wheelchair.  they were already doing the exact same thing hubby and i were planning to do!  and there i was, watching them in awe, teary-eyed as always, because God's ways of making me realize His blessings for me and my little family are simply awesome.

so wish me luck and by the grace of God, the patience, perseverance and will to carry this through.

Birthing a business is like birthing a baby.

You go through the gestation period as you begin to manifest your idea.

http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/starting-a-business-is-like-having-a-baby

can i have a drink?

 
last week, we fetched the little big man about thirty minutes late and found him at the church corridor with his cousin, the other godson.  before he jumped in the car, he asked his dad to roll down his side of the car window and told him.

dad give me 18 pesos.  i need to pay the ate who let us drink this.  he was holding a foil packed orange juice.

the hubby handed him some change and he skipped/hopped/sped away towards the front of the church.

when he came back he told us his story.  he and the other godson were sitting waiting  for me and hubby and they were verrry thirsty.  so he went over to the "ate" vendor

ate, can i buy 2 drinks because me and my cousin are soooo thirsty.  i'll pay later when my dad arrives.

the good ate gave them.  true to his word, the little big man did when we arrived.  so the hubby drove around the church to see where the ate was vending juice and as we drove by, the little big man rolled down his window and shouted, thank you ate!

after rolling back up the window, he seemed proud of himself.  then told us, i will befriend that ate.  so when time comes, she may give me free drinks. 

toink.  i guess he's learning the ropes pretty well at his age.


***the little big man has been attending for three days per week for about 4 weeks now,  seminars on becoming a church altar boy.  and he's scheduled to be "ordained" (i don't know what it's called) on friday, coinciding with th feast of our lady of fatima, our parish church.

mother's day

my friend andre often tells me i'm such a great and patient mom.  in the mothering department, i do not believe i am excelling but i do try my best. 

now here's a mom who i know has been striving perfection in mothering since i was a little girl.  well, she's still not perfect and i guess never will be.  but what matters most is that she's always been there for me and my brothers, through thick and thin, unconditionally loving us and forgiving us. 

Happy Mother's Day Mommy!  We love you sooo much!

A mother is the truest friend we have, when trials heavy and sudden, fall upon us;

when adversity takes the place of prosperity;

when friends who rejoice with us in our sunshine desert us;

when trouble thickens around us, still will she cling to us,

and endeavor by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness,

and cause peace to return to our hearts.

-Washington Irving

four

i did mention that we've sort of officially adopted the teenage godson yeah?  when that boy was a baby, the hubby was still the boyfriend at the time, i took care of him and loved him like my own.  now that he's grown, still needing  parental love and care, we're still here for him because we've accepted the fact that he needs us.

and then there's the other godson.

i've been ranting, but not blogging, about how irresponsible parents he had and why the heck they're making others, hubby and i in particular, take responsibility over his needs.  just last week, i decided to shun him out because i felt abused by his parents, letting him stay at our house during the holy week break, and THEN making him come back the very next day after i returned him to their house and THEN telling my mom i am discriminating their son.

until a spark of enlightenment came over the hubby yesterday morning and told me, you know what, it's not that boy's fault.  he is already unlucky that his parents aren't taking care of him and can't give him their best time and effort.  and while our kids are enjoying our love and affection, why not let him share in that?  after all, God has been blessing us so much that maybe, He wants us to be a blessing to others as well.  and just like that, we decided to take him in and be pseudo parents to him as well. 

it's a liberating feeling to accept something that i've staved off for so long. 
so now here's our little, but growing, brood of 4....

conversations

so the other day, it was early morning we were in the bedroom.  five of us, me, hubby, the little big man, the little girl and the teenage godson who we've sort of officially adopted this summer.  we were lazing around while the 3 boys were trying to annoy the little girl.

during weekends, whenever our little family has nothing to get up early for, we usually oversleep and lie around in bed until our stomachs start to growl.  with that, baths are usually taken later in the day, not in the morning and you would understand why after some heckling with the little girl, she goes:

mommy, ang baho nyang lalakeng yan!

sinong lalake?  since i didn't exactly know who she was referring to among the 3.

iyan asawa mong yan!


translation:
mommy, that man stinks!
which man?
that husband of yours!

the royal wedding

nice wedding.  for a moment there, i almost got teary-eyed as i watched the princess-to-be waving at people from inside that 1977 rolls-royce phantom iv with glass panels.  took me back to the first royal wedding i witnessed back when i was a kid (yes, i was just a kid then!) of then prince charles and lady diana.

the people on the streets overwhelmed me.  made me happy for the couple to see that those people actually love them and are happy for them.

the wedding dress by sarah burton at alexander mcqueen was pure elegance and the wedding bouquet was simple but classy.

nice trees inside the cathedral.  and man, westminster abbey was BEAUTIFUL.  made me tell the hubby to bring me there someday when we become rich, to hear mass.  only to find out they're not catholic.

simple wedding rites with no mushy vows.  but bordered on boring.  i was actually waiting for the groom and bride to do something quirky to make it a little less serious.  but well, what did i expect from a royal wedding, right?  they did exchange a few quick glances and grins which was enough for me to say "awww..."

yes, harry was cuter than william.  but hey, when william put on his hat after the ceremony, he WAS CUTER.

too bad i missed the royal kiss on the balcony coz i got up from in front of the tv to call my mom.  but well.  googled pics just now of the kiss and found them quite satisfactory.

so there goes my evening.  what to do now but wait for hubby having a royal night out.  yes, just outside in the terrace with the boys.

so there.  i just had to blog about this wedding.  good night.